Divine Intervention

With every news channel trying to best each other by being the first reveal who will be the next Pope, the rest of the world is sitting around wondering what the hell is taking so long and what they could possibly be doing all locked up in there.

Well, you heard it here first folks. The Delawarean brings you the inside scoop on what all those Bishops, Cardinals, and other religious figureheads are doing...

As it turns out, they're testing the latest video game in the Grand Theft Auto series...

I hear they replaced the prostitutes from previous games with young boys...